Turning 30 was meant to be a joyful milestone, but for one Malaysian woman, her birthday became a sobering lesson about expectations in love.
In an anonymous post on XUAN’s Facebook page, she shared her frustration after dropping hints to her boyfriend that she wanted an iPhone 17, as she was still using an iPhone 14 he had previously gifted her.
Instead, she received a phone worth just over RM1,000 — far below the gift she had been hoping for. She said this came as a shock, given that he had previously showered her with thoughtful gifts such as bracelets, handbags and small surprises.
“On top of that, he only arranged a simple candlelight dinner. My emotions got the better of me. I lost control, smashed the phone on the ground, walked away, didn’t eat the dinner, and ignored him for several days,” she admitted.
After cooling down, she began reflecting on her feelings and their relationship. “I even started to feel that maybe he doesn’t love me that much. If a man truly loves me, shouldn’t he try his best to give me what I want? When I see my friends receiving luxury brands or being taken overseas by their boyfriends or husbands, I feel envious,” she wrote.
The story took another turn when the boyfriend later apologised and revealed he had already bought a ring and planned to propose. However, after the birthday incident, she admitted she was reconsidering their compatibility, realising their understanding of love, effort, and expectations differed significantly.
“If you were me, and you realised that your understanding of ‘love, effort and expectations’ differed so greatly, would you accept his proposal — or reject it?” she asked, sparking a broader conversation on relationships and differing expectations in modern love.
This incident has resonated with many, highlighting how material expectations and emotional responses can clash even in long-term relationships.
