‘If I Hold On They Suffer, If I Let Go I’ll Regret It’ — Father’s Heartbreaking Post On Divorce And Custody

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A Malaysian father has taken to social media to express his worries over the future of his two children as he and his wife head for divorce after more than a decade together.

The man wrote that he and his wife have been together for 11 years, married for 7, and that she has brought up separation or divorce “at least 50 times.” Each time, he tried to reconcile, but said this time he agreed, believing it would allow them to settle things quickly.

He said the most painful part of the process has been the children. For the past three years, he claims he has been the primary caregiver for their eldest child — from school runs to homework and bedtime — while his wife focused on their younger child who is still breastfeeding. He had planned to continue caring for the older child and allow the younger one to stay with his mother, but his wife insisted the brothers should not be separated.

The father also voiced concern over what he described as his wife’s behaviour in front of the children, alleging she makes comments that suggest he has another woman and pressures the children to say they want to live with her. He fears that his eldest son, already showing signs of temper, may be emotionally affected.

“I’m not trying to fight or control her. My priority is the children’s well-being,” he wrote, adding that changing environments might not be in the best interests of their eldest, who has become more independent.

He concluded his post by saying he feels torn: “If I hold on, the kids suffer; if I let go, I may regret it.” He appealed for neutral advice from readers and asked for no mockery or sarcasm.

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