A Malaysian mother recently shared her experience with XUAN, recounting a bittersweet moment during a family outing. She and her husband had taken their child to a café, only to be politely turned away by the staff, who informed them that the café does not accommodate children under 12.
Rather than causing a scene, the family thanked the staff and quietly left, later choosing to dine at another café that welcomed children.
In her reflection, the mother said she wasn’t entirely surprised. She acknowledged that more and more public spaces are setting restrictions, and children often seem to be the first group excluded. She empathized with those who seek a quiet dining environment and admitted that children can sometimes be noisy or difficult to manage, which is why she and her husband have been actively teaching their child how to behave appropriately in public.
She also understood the café’s reasoning—children running around can lead to spilled drinks, disrupt other guests, or even pose safety risks. As parents, she and her husband are fully aware that their child can sometimes be mischievous, but they are committed to raising a considerate and mindful young person.
Despite understanding the café’s perspective, she couldn’t help but feel a twinge of sadness. It made her wonder: is society becoming less inclusive toward children?
She reflected on how society often talks about healing childhood wounds and breaking generational cycles, yet when parents attempt to create loving and supportive environments and bring their children into the community, they can still feel pushed to the sidelines.
She emphasized that while she respects every business owner’s right to set rules, she hopes that child-related policies can be clearly stated on websites or social media, so parents won’t be left disappointed after arriving in hope. Children, she said, need to learn rules—but they also deserve space in society. If adults can ask for understanding, why not extend the same to families with children?
At the end of the post, she recalled her child asking, “Why can’t we go in?” She gently replied, “Maybe that café just isn’t the right fit for us. Let’s go find one that has strawberry cake.” As they walked quietly side by side, she wrote, “There was a touch of bitterness that had nothing to do with coffee.”
So what do you think—should cafés and public spaces be more inclusive toward children?
